“I can't talk about my singing. I'm inside it. How can you describe something you're inside of?” Janis Joplin
You are my hiding place;
You preserve me from trouble;
You surround me with songs of deliverance. Selah.
Psalm 32:7 NASB
Since my dad passed away in August of 2017, I have had a very difficult time. Just being real here. After he passed away, I had several good weeks where I felt tinges of grief and felt I was traversing the journey pretty well and then the first week of December hit and I began to experience panic attacks and many sleepless nights. Grief was overwhelming me and I had not expected it to be so overwhelming. My first Christmas ever without my dad caught me by surprise - as did his December birthday.
Grief is the feeling of loss. Mourning is the outward expression of that loss and I was not doing so well at mourning. I finally began to get some relief as time passed by, but when March came around in 2018, I began to fall back down into the bottomless pit grief can become. Melinda had been fighting for me and holding me up emotionally, but by this time, she began to be overwhelmed by my emotional overloads.
She began experiencing what is called compassion fatigue. She had come to the end of her ability to hold me up along with her own emotional needs. She basically told me she could not do it any more and that I needed to begin fighting for myself, to fight harder at digging myself out of the deep dark pit of emotional self pity. I needed to hear that.
In a nutshell, this song was my way of fighting out of the darkness and what I have been challenging people to do for decades. I needed to practice what I preached! This has become my new go to song of deliverance. It also helps me to focus on the needs of others rather than on always having to focus on my own. My needs are met when I seek to meet the needs of others.
Concerning grief and mourning as it relates to the diagnosis of Parkinson’s disease, I had gone for far too long without even understanding that part of what I was experiencing was grief over my diagnosis. A friend just asked me one day, “Have you ever grieved the diagnosis of Parkinson’s?” Those words hit me like a ton of bricks.
What I realized is that I had been holding that grief deeply inside of me in order to appear strong for my family. When I realized that this buildup of sorrow was doing more damage than good, I began to pour out my grief in active, outward mourning. I let go of the sorrow I felt at the loss of my stamina…at the loss of my youth…at the loss of my mental stamina…at the potential loss of my life…at the loss of time with children and grandchildren…at the way my lack of mourning my diagnosis had robbed me of deeper intimacy with my wife. This song helps me mourn and move on from sorrow and into joy…because God praised comfort to all those who mourn.
God’s Word is true. He surrounds me with songs of deliverance. I just need to listen. He rejoices over me with singing. I just need to listen. When my Father sings over me, I am instantly aware of His presence completely consuming me…completely consuming my sorrow, my suffering, my pain, my worry, my fear, and my anxiety because He sings from the place of perfect, all-consuming love. The result of His singing? Grace to get through pain and deliverance from sorrow. What is left when grace and love intersect with a song from God’s heart? Peace and joy. Dare to believe God sings over you…
This song is dedicated to my wife, Melinda. Thanks for fighting for me and for fighting the enemy with me. I love you.
Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
Matthew 5:4 NASB
You are my hiding place;
You preserve me from trouble;
You surround me with songs of deliverance.
Selah.
Psalm 32:7 NASB
Here is my own translation of one of my favorite verses from God’s Word:
Zephaniah 3:17
The eternal self-existent God, the God Who is three in one; He Who dwells in the center of your being is a powerful and valiant warrior. He has come to set you free, to keep you safe, and to bring you victory. He is cheered and He beams with exceeding joy and takes pleasure in your presence. He has engraved a place for Himself in you and there He quietly rests in His love and affection for you. He cannot contain Himself at the thought of you and with the greatest of joy spins around wildly in anticipation over you…and has placed you above all other creations and in the highest place in His priorities. In fact, He shouts and sings in triumph, joyfully proclaiming the gladness of His heart in a song of rejoicing! All because of you!
(Translation by Dennis Jernigan)
Dennis Jernigan
To listen to The Dennis Jernigan Podcast version of this teaching and to hear the song, go to http://podcast.dennisjernigan.com/e/father-sing-over-me/
Photo courtesy of https://cdn.pixabay.com/photo/2017/09/21/01/04/father-2770301_1280.jpg
Father, Sing Over Me
WORDS & MUSIC
Dennis Jernigan
March 27, 2018
You are Living Water in a dry and weary land
In the shaking times You're Solid Rock where I can stand
When the storms of life come You're a Shelter over me
You are Light in darkness Watching over me
In the times of wounding You come healing me
When fear would come surrounding
You come singing over me
Father, sing over me when I'm losing it!
Father, sing over me when I'm wounded!
Father, sing over me with Your presence!
Father, sing over me with Your love!
Father, sing over me love unending!
Father, sing over me! I'm surrendering!
Father, sing over me with Your presence!
Father, sing over me!
Father, sing over me!
Father, sing over me!
I will be your Righteousness and you be My redeemed!
I will be your Holiness and I have washed you clean!
Child, hear Me singing! This is what I'm singing over you!
I will be your Hiding Place! My love concealing you!
I will be your comfort! Let My love come healing through!
Child, hear Me singing! This is what I'm singing over you!
I will be Provider! I will meet your every need!
I will be your Champion! Find in Me your victory!
Child, hear Me sing-ing! This is what I'm singing over you!
I will be right with you! I will never, ever leave!
I will be your Shepherd! If you let Me, I will lead!
Child, hear Me singing! This is what I'm singing over you!
Father, sing over me when I'm losing it!
Father, sing over me when I'm wounded!
Father, sing over me with Your presence!
Father, sing over me with Your love!
Father, sing over me love unending!
Father, sing over me! I'm surrendering!
Father, sing over me with Your presence!
Father, sing over me!
Father, sing over me!
Father, sing over me!
Janis Joplin quote - https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/janis_joplin_797295?src=t_singing