A Work of Art

I originally wrote this as a gift for my wife on her birthday in 2019, but felt it was appropriate to share with you what it means to me to have her in my life as we celebrate our 37th year of marriage today.

A Work of Art
I will never forget the first time I ever saw you. With one glimpse of your beauty my breath was taken from me and my heart nearly stopped beating…yet I knew you were far, far out of my league. I saw you and your radiance as something more captivating and exquisite than the Mona Lisa. Saw myself as a formless lump of clay that could never be worthy of even being in the same room as such an amazing work of art. You were at once a complete mystery to me yet a mystery that intrigued me enough to consider pursuing…
When you spoke, all I could hear was the most melodic and romantic symphony that could have only been created by a master musician, such was your wisdom and knowledge and charm and grace. When I spoke - or attempted to speak - all I could hear was the banjo theme of a country bumpkin attempting to sound like he had never seen even one episode of Hee Haw…yet my ignorance always gave me away.
Still, you began to let me into your heart - into your world. Most of the time I felt absolutely overwhelmed at the sheer lack of sophistication I saw in myself but stood amazed at the sheer sophistication and confidence in which you seemed so comfortable magnified a thousand times in you. It was almost too good to be true - that someone like you could even acknowledge the existence of someone like me. A work of art caring for a lump of clay. Sounds so ridiculous when I say it out loud, but that is how I viewed us.
I had absolutely no framework of reference of how to treat such a priceless treasure as you seemed to me, much less a frame of reference as to how to properly and sufficiently navigate any type of romantic relationship with you. Yet, you saw something in me that I could never see. I saw it in you in droves. Worth. You were worth more than me risking hurting you by speaking the words, “I love you”, just to gain physical touch. I saw you as a fine piece of alabaster, fragile yet strong, beautiful beyond measure…to be cared for and valued above all else. I wanted you to feel treasured and valued…yet found it difficult to communicate that to you because I possessed neither in my own life. The lump of clay.
That you would even attempt a relationship with me made me love you all the more. The closer we became, the more fear gripped my heart and mind. How could I ever possibly give you what you needed when I felt so absolutely needy myself? I felt like a ping pong ball, bouncing from ‘could it be possible to love someone like you the way you deserved’ to ‘if she sees me as I truly am, she will reject me’. By the time we were seniors in college, I knew a day of reckoning was coming.
I will never forget the look on your face when I told you I never wanted to see you again…how broken your heart seemed to be. My reason? Better to break her heart once and for all than to drag her through years of torment and insecurity and failure and pain. After all, a work of art deserved to be displayed with other works of art…and I was no work of art. In that moment I felt more like a shapeless, formless, worthless lump of clay than ever. You seemed more exquisitely beautiful to me than ever. In my heart, I felt I had done the right thing.
Funny how God uses the brokenness of our lives to bring about the most exquisite works of art. The heartache of losing you sent me into a downward spiral that ended in a miry pit of self-loathing mire…and Father met me there with love like I had always imagined possible but never thought possible for myself. By the time I hit rock bottom, this lump of formless clay had become so hard and brittle that it had finally shattered…but the Master Artist began to put me back together, piece by broken piece…until a mosaic that looked a lot like redemption began to take shape.
With a stroke of masterful genius, the Master Craftsman used a feeble prayer to lead me back to you. “If you want me to be married, Lord, speak that through my parents.” The very next week, my parents told me they always thought I would be the first of their four sons to marry, to which I flippantly responded, “Who do you think I should have married?” Without one moment’s worth of hesitation, they both said, “Melinda was the one for you.”
That moment sent me reeling with hope yet simultaneously sent me careening through my thoughts with fear! Reeling with the hope that someone like you could love someone like me…and careening through my mind at the same moment the fear of being rejected by someone like you! So I asked the Lord to speak through your parents if this was truly his will…and He did.
Your mom answered the letter I wrote her and gave me permission to pursue you. A month later we were engaged. Almost a year later we were married. The complete fulfillment and contentment and satisfaction and pleasure of knowing you in every way filled my heart with more joy and hope than I thought I could possibly ever experience in this life. I thought I knew you…but the mystery was just beginning!
God was transforming me into a work of art and He was doing the same in you. I was learning how to be a man. You were learning how to be a woman. But more importantly, He was teaching us how to be a son and a daughter first…to know our identity. It was like starting at ground zero and working our way through a grand adventure of discovery…a thrilling journey called life, chock full of twists and turns and tragedies and triumphs, an epic saga and greatest love story ever told.
Still as opposite from one another in almost every way possible, yet still both valuable works of art in the Master Craftsman’s hands, He was slowly teaching us the dance of romance…a divine and diverse set of steps and motions that we are still attempting to learn to this day.
We danced through the season of raising our nine children with many trips and falls along the way, but what was left in our wake - nine magnificent children - was worth every misstep and challenge along the way.
We now dance into the latter years where children begin to marry and begin dances of their own. We are learning the precious dance of grand parenting that we get to pretty much make up along the way. What an adventure! Such adventures are always more joyful when shared with another…and I am so grateful I get to share these adventures with you!
You are still a mystery to me. A mystery I feel even more challenged to unravel with my final days. Though we face a season where my health has become the major challenge we face - we face it together. Without you, I would not…could not last a day longer.

You are priceless to me…

You are a precious treasure to me…

You are the obsession of my heart…

You are the perfect fit for me in every way…spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically…

You are a symphony straight from God’s heart to mine that declares, “See how much I love you, son?”…

You truly are a work of art…and you helped transform this former lump of clay into something I never thought I would or ever could be…whole…

You are the wind beneath my wings…

You make life feel like an intricate dance that truly captivates my heart…

You are the muse that inspires beauty and melody and music to my soul…

You absolutely complete me…

Though the seasons of our lives change, these things I have spoken will always remain…always…

I absolutely and honestly love you…

Happy 37th Anniversary…

DJ